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If you’ve clicked into this article then I’m sorry to say my friend, you’re a Grinch. Some part of you just doesn’t mesh well with mainstream society. The things that bring other people joy are the things that intensify your anxiety.
But don’t fret, you can still find your place in this world without having to be cheerful and hopeful all the time.
“Sorry, I can’t hear you. I don’t speak ridiculous.” — The Grinch
The word pessimist is inherently negative, right? No one wants to be a pessimist. You’d like to have faith and think that everything will be alright.
Well, that just isn’t always the case.
You can try as hard as you’d like to paint a pretty picture of a situation, but sometimes it just ain’t that pretty.
So how are you supposed to cope with the fact that people around you are so optimistic?
What I do, is stay true to myself. I remind myself that there are 7.9 billion people in the world, and it’s impossible for them all to like what I have to say.
Think about it.
People try to please everyone around them all the time and are still met with resistance. No matter what they do or say, they can’t seem to get to a consensus about almost any topic.
That’s because it’s impossible. There are just too many people out there for there to be a harmonious opinion about EVERYTHING.
So what do most people do? They conform.
It’s not wrong to want people to agree with you. It makes life easier and allows you to make connections. But what if you don’t want people to agree with you? What if you’re okay with fostering cynical opinions about life?
It’s not as simple as just “being different”. Most of us have this innate need to want to fit in. The key to being your own person is owning what makes you different. People might criticize you or try to convince you Why you should be more like them.
Don’t give in. That’s the easy way out!
*Walks on snow* “This is the loudest snow I’ve ever heard in my life.” — The Grinch
If you find yourself getting annoyed by little things, or people, and can’t shake the negative feelings, own them. Don’t let other people’s positive outlook on life make you feel like your opinions aren’t worthy. Who decided that everyone needs to be the same?
It’s so unnatural to try and be happy all the time. Forcing positivity is a sure way to pave the way for your pessimism to come crawling back, in spite.
“Max, stop socializing.” — The Grinch
I understand that being negative in a world already saturated in negativity might not be the most pleasant thing in the world. I get that you want to be a light in people’s lives and not the opposite. I get it, I really do. I just think that what we want, and what we can realistically achieve, are two different things.
“Realistic.” I love that word. If I’m being honest, I’m more of a realist than I am a pessimist. I think the two go hand in hand sometimes. Most pessimists are just outwardly portraying their need to stay grounded.
What do I mean by this?
Being realistic is an underrated trait that many people seem to lack. They have big dreams and their feelings of grandeur manipulate them into thinking that anything is possible.
Well, no it’s not.
Sorry to burst your happy bubble, but that’s the harsh truth.
Sure, you can achieve great things, anyone can. But can you achieve EVERYTHING? No.
Optimism is a way for people to cope with things going wrong. “Well, I failed the test, okay, next time I’ll do better!”
Sure, that’s a great outlook. It’s fantastic to have such high expectations for yourself. But do you genuinely feel that way, or are you only being optimistic because that’s what’s expected of you? Deep inside, do you not think there’s a chance you’ll fail again?
Pessimists are just more aware of this phenomenon. They know things can’t be perfect all the time, and they don’t care. Life is complicated and cruel but instead of trying to pretend it isn’t, they just accept it.
And obviously, the world isn’t black and white. You can be realistic and also be an optimist. The two aren’t mutually exclusive. That’s what’s great about human beings. We’re complex and interesting and we’re all DIFFERENT.
I also truly believe that optimists and pessimists can coexist peacefully. As long as they acknowledge that there is no right or wrong way to live, it’s possible.
“4:00, wallow in self-pity;
4:30, stare into the abyss;
5:00, solve world hunger, tell no one;
5:30, jazzercise;
6:30, dinner with me — I can’t cancel that again;
7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing… I’m booked. Of course, if I bump the loathing to 9, I could still be done in time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness.” — The Grinch
So whether you’re an optimist, pessimist, or both, make an effort to understand the people around you.
It may make you feel uncomfortable when someone is always negative, but try to see things from their perspective.
And during this holiday season, don’t be afraid to be a Grinch…you’re allowed to be apathetic during the “most wonderful time of the year”.
I’d love to start a conversation about this:
Are you an optimist or a Grinch? Somewhere in between? I’d love to know.
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